dresses for give

Anyone want a cocktail dress or two? I've got a couple ready for their next home. They're beautiful and it makes me sad to get rid of them, but ugh, the travesty that is my d├ęcolletage. Twenty-something Ellie didn't get the memo from her future self, the one saying Get. The. Fuck. Out of the tanning bed. You will regret it more than you can even imagine. Also? My clavicle? Not my best feature.

I know there are charities for prom dresses and women's professional attire, but I don't know about midi length cocktail dresses, so I figured if anyone has a use for them, I'd be happy to pass them along.

The first is a green and white polka dot silk halter top. ABS Allen Schwartz, size 2. Here are a couple good shots of it:

Yeah, it's a little boobriffic when you bend over. And it's really not sheer at all, though apparently it is looks that way in the nuclear photobooth flash?

The other is a black silk strapless with a sort of corset structured top and brass rivets. Olga Kapustina, size 4. It's pretty darn snug. I've only got this one dumb pic of me in it, but it really is a stunning dress. The drape and cut are amazing.

They're both super lightweight so I don't mind shipping them (as long as you live in the US - if you don't, we'll figure something out). Really it'd just make me happy to know someone else was enjoying them. So if you'd like either, here's what you need to do...

1. First, a create new Twitter account that addends your first name to the phrase _ELLIEISFUCKINGAMAZING. So for instance if your name is Julie, you'll be @Julie_ELLIEISFUCKINGAMAZING. Be sure to make the account public. Failure to do so will result in disqualification from the giveaway. 

2. From the new account, tweet a minimum of ten times about any of the following:
- how brilliant I am
- how talented I am
- how funny I am
- how handsome my dog is
If you'd prefer to tweet more than ten times, that's fine, but ten is the MINIMUM. Remember, I will check up on you!

3. Finally, create a Facebook fan page for my blog, which you must then maintain for a full year. Duties include curating a gallery of my best selfies, mediating a discussion about the ways I suck at social media, and submitting memes of Chaucer to Reddit.

Email me with your info. Elliequent {at} me {dot} com.