lined up

Pretty emotional tonight, in a very good way. In approximately 24 hours I'll be getting ready to head out to the first live music show I have been to in a year and a half, at least. My butterflies have butterflies, which are still larvae, but which will have hatched by 10pm tomorrow. And the swarm will carry me into a club filled with people who share my interests, or at least one of them, whose faces I will be able to see and smile at, if I so choose. I may cry. I may fucking cry, because #emotionaldysregulation. Or I may just laugh nonstop with giddiness. But I tell you what, that is the kind of intense happiness I wouldn't give up for all the world, because it is so intoxicating. And I'll be in the thrall of it, in less than 24 hours. I've never seen ARTBAT, but if their Insta is any indication, it's going to be a really good time. 

If you don't follow me on IG, then you didn't see me lose my shit over scoring a Deadmau5 ticket for his show Sunday. For context, Deadmau5 is my absolute favorite musician of all time, all genres, no contest. That's it. That's the context. I am obsessed with him and I catch him every chance I get. Usually that's at a festival two or more hours away. Once it was at USC, a twenty minute train ride away, when my date was so obviously bored it sapped all the fun for me. On Sunday though? It's at a venue literally five blocks from my apartment. A ten minute walk. My actual neighborhood. On Sunday, a night I finish work early anyway. Could not be more perfect. It was a surprise last minute show announcement, I'm guessing he had plans to be in LA for the 4th and then told his promoter Fuck it, book me. When I saw the announcement on Twitter I truly stared uncomprehendingly at it for a good two minutes before scrambling to get a ticket. Naturally it is sold out. But I will be there, motherfuckers. I will be there, closer to Joel Zimmerman than I have ever been before. Happy end of pandemic to me.

Then, after ARTBAT tomorrow and Deadmau5 Sunday I've got Cosmic Gate a few weeks later, then Beyond Wonderland at the end of August, for which I already have my outfit, made up of colors I normally wouldn't be caught dead in, i.e. cantaloupe and lilac.

It is very important to me that you know my backpack and shoes are both purple, too. As will be my hoodie. 

And before you excoriate me for being way, way too old for this nonsense, know that my plan for some time now -- since Covid kicked into high gear -- has been to spend one last, crazy year in LA, soaking up as many shows and festivals as I can, then "retire" gracefully (?) from the scene and move somewhere north, cold, and a lot more quiet. Of course, that was before I got moved to a salary the size of which I was not expecting. So now who knows. 

Regardless: one day night at a time. One wonderful, joyful, stupidly playful night at a time.